When The Break Up You Were Waiting For Happens!

My first reaction when DH called me from the living room to come listen to the news of the Brangelina split on BBC was, "OMG!!!!! YESSSSSS!! THANK GOODNESSSSSS!!!!!!", before I realised I would now be officially classified as a "hater", lol! Forgive me if my views seem quite unforgiving but I'm just expressing myself; I've been waiting for this break up to happen like forever, seriously, they lasted longer than I ever hoped they would!

This is not the type of "bad belle" that Wendy Williams has for Kimye where she's literally counting down till when they break up- I really couldn't care more or less about them but I would hope that they stay together- with Brangelina, I felt like a stakeholder in their relationship because I had been a fan of BraJen- Brad and Jennifer Aniston- so the breakup which had unequivocally been caused by Brad's affair with Angelina Jolie just made me really dislike the duo- even when and inspite of the fact that I loved to look at them together and thought they were a powerful looking couple; the sexiness they exuded, individually and together, was amazing to behold.

So Angelina has filed for a divorce citing irreconciliable differences and all I can think is, "Finally!". I just think that anyone who can bear to watch another go through the emotional pains that comes with the end of a relationship they don't necessarily want to end because of their own selfish desires really does not deserve a happily-ever-after. Not Brad, Not Angelina. It doesn't matter how the scenario is analysed to show up the inherent weakness in the previous relationship that led to the affair-turned-relationship, as long as there were innocent parties involved who were going to be hurt, the resulting affair-turned-relationship had no business happening in the first place.

I am reminded of my own experience a long time ago- what I have often referred to as my only heartbreak- I had been dating one guy for quite a number of years and the relationship had been physically and emotionally abusive. It had been so physically abusive but when I would leave, he'd call on all of his elder sisters, relations, pastors, everybody, to come and beg me- in retrospect eh, thunder will fire one particular pastor infact that almost "wed" us in reconciliation after one serious beating session. When I'd ask his sisters why they didn't see anything wrong in his hitting me, they'd tell me it was because he loved me. And he was a serial cheat as well so I was always under one emotional stress or the other.

The thing was, we cut a dashing picture as a couple and he was always so attentive and tended to spoil me but the friends who knew about the physical abuse didn' t think it was right, others told me that those who were telling me to leave were jealous and wanted to "snatch" him. I think that at the time, physical abuse wasn't really viewed the way it now is....  Anyway, long and short was, we were always breaking up and making up, so much so that the break ups tended to be my time to sort my emotions and self out. On one of these break ups, he begins, as normal, to come back with full force, asking for a 100th chance and after a lot of begging. I decide to give him this chance only, he tells me he had had a "fling" with a friend of mine and was trying to end the said fling.

I hadn't believed this cos the said "friend" had been one of those who castigated my still being with him despite the physical abuse and she also had like a veeerrryyy serious, albeit, "safelooking" boyfriend (mine had been a sorta daredevil kind- I had had a thing for bad boys then) and had been in a very serious relationship with him, I couldn't imagine that she would leave her boyfriend to start to date mine. I didn't think she was the type to do that neither did I think she would "deign" to put herself in that situation- she just wasn't who i would have expected to do that is my point. When I called her, she laughed over the line and said that she hadn't done anything wrong as we (me and ex) had been having issues at the time. Long and short is that the whole issue turned into a drawn out debacle that had me bowing out of what became a disgraceful love triangle. I felt betrayed and disgraced in front of everyone in our circle- especially to have been seen to concede "defeat" in the way I had.

It was especially really hurtful because she went out of her way to do things that were spiteful e.g at the wedding of a friend of ours, she'd make souveniers with their pic and names on so, lets say its a cup, you'll see a pic of them with the sign off- "from so and so"..... It was all really quite humiliating to say the least and I knew it was her doing it, not him, I knew him enough to know he would not come up with these ideas..... She also once came with a group of our friends to visit my roomate (we all were in a circle of friends) and stood there looking through my pictures. I'd felt downright insulted and that had resulted in me slapping a friend of ours by the end of that visit- it was wrong to have gotten physical, but I felt she just kept pushing it and our friends became divided into camps....

I'd felt humiliated but I moved on with life but I would be lying if I said that I wasn't overjoyed to hear he began beating and cheating on her, I'm sure a lot of people could have sworn he wouldn't have "tried that with her as she was tougher than JJJ". Tut, tut. Tough luck. It was with even greater joy I received news of their break up years later- in the period when we had had a face-to-face, she'd said to me that she would not go ahead to date him except she received direction from God that "he was the one". 

Kwakwakwakwakwakwa!!!! Ok!

Anyway, I know this post is pretty petty but, that's just how I feel mehn, I can't even pretend to be nice or have something uplifting to say about it- I do feel bad for the children but my hope is that they co-parent efficiently so as not to let this affect them but, I am quite pleased with how things have turned out.  This is all the closure Jennifer Aniston needs after all these years.

Love Always,

Judgejudyjudy...

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